Weekly Weigh In: No Weigh In Pass

Yep, for the first time ever I chose to use a "no weigh in pass" and just attend the meeting.  On Friday night I worked much later than I had anticipated and when I got home my husband and made steak and potatoes.  Well, I'm kind of weird about day before weigh in foods and liquid consumption so I would have never made that dinner the day before my meeting but it was very sweet he made dinner.  So I ate it. Only 4 oz. of the steak but still, not the ideal foods to eat on that day. Also, all night I had a really scratchy throat so I wound up drinking 32 oz. of water through out the night. I woke up and had gained 2 lbs.  I was so disappointed and I felt like if I weighed in and saw my recorded weight as +2, I would have been bummed for days and probably ate junk food so that's all my excuses for not weighing in.  I really want to hit the 15lb mark this Saturday but that means I'm going to probably have to double up on workouts and I'm not sure if I feel that dedicated this week.  Pathetic but true!

This week our leader wrote a list of can't foods and can foods meaning what we can and can't have and of course all the junk food and fast food went into the can't column and all the healthy produce and lean proteins went into the can column.  Someone finally spoke up and said all those items in the can't column we actually can have. Of course this was the answer my leader was fishing for:)  We talked about how we avoid all those can't foods and often times over eat on healthy foods which still add up or we quit the program because our urge to have the can't foods is too strong to overcome.  She encouraged us to pick our favorite can't food, plan out the points and portion and add it back into our meal plan this week.  For me it's ice cream.  Hands down.  I honestly probably ate at least 1 1/2 cups each time I ate it.  Who decided a 1/2 cup was a serving??  Nowadays I have my splurge on the weekend and I admit that I may overeat on the splurge foods or eating out at a restaurant (like the half basket of chips at the Mexican restaurant) when what I really wanted was the dang ice cream.

I bought Dreyer's Slow Churned Strawberry ice cream and tonight I'll portion it out by the 1/2 cup into my Ziploc 4 oz. containers.  I also bought 2 containers of strawberries that I'm going to slice up and eat with the ice cream to fill me up and get a serving of fruit in.  I'm a little nervous to do it but if it works, great.  If I get tempted to eat more than a serving then I just know it's a food I can't bring into the house and I just need to go out for ice cream if that's what I want to splurge on that week.

And on a final note, can I just say right now, losing weight feels like the hardest thing in the world and that I'm scared to death of failing again and that I can't even picture how it would feel to be a normal weight.  I'm trying to hold on with everything I have because I have often times thought in the past 2 weeks that this is going to be just another failed attempt.  I hope my thoughts are wrong but only time will tell.