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Monday, January 2, 2012

Finally Happy to Hear Pregnancy News!

I've heard women who struggled with infertility talk about how hard it is to hear when friends announce their pregnancy and I definitely had my moments along my 3 1/2 year journey to get pregnant.  It got to a point where when the baby shower invite arrived in the mailbox, I quickly replied that I could not attend because I had "other commitments", went to Target to pick something off their registry and walking through the aisles wishing I had the scanner gun in hand to select all the items for MY BABY registry instead of once again buying someone else a baby gift, wrapped the gift, then dropped it off a day or two before the shower.  Now up until I had a baby, none of my BFF's had babies so I wasn't going so far as to decline invites of women who were practically family to me, but I knew I couldn't handle another 3-4 hour baby shower where I'd be on the verge of tears the entire time.  And some of you that haven't received your BFP (and please let 2012 be the year you do get it!!!) you've probably wondered if you'll ever feel different about hearing someone else's baby news and being able to legitimately be happy for them. 

Well, I'm here to say, I think you will because I am able to do it...............my best friend of 24 years just told me she's pregnant and my lip didn't even quiver or my eyes well up wishing it was  me or how unfair it was that it happened for her....on accident....while she was on birth control.....with her boyfriend of only 3 months.  Nope, I actually wanted to reach through the phone and give her a big hug!  I didn't even want to throw any comments out about how it must be nice to get pregnant on accident without the use of drugs, transvaginal ultrasounds and lots of money because insurance didn't cover it.  I know my friend is probably shaken up with the unexpected news and as much as infertility was hard on me and changed who I was (went from crying twice a year if even that and being the life of the party....to well....buying stock in Kleenex and having to actually make myself smile through the PPD), I am thankful for not getting pregnant on accident while still just dating my husband and while he was in the military or even better yet, not getting pregnant while dating all the "winners" I did before my husband.  Even though we would have made it work just like she will, I would still choose the way it happened for us.

I'm already planning all the things I will make her for her baby and I'm digging out What to Expect When You are Expecting, Baby Wise, breastfeeding books, and my Jenny McCarthy books to pass on to her this week.  The news of her pregnancy is still shocking to me just in the way of she is probably the last person I expected to get pregnant in this way, but jealous or sad...not even close!

I would still love to have at least one more baby, but not right now and when the time comes I'm sure it won't be on accident and it will probably still involve monitoring by my doctor, a handful of blood tests, ultrasounds and a few pills but right now, I'm enjoying other friends' pregnancy news and not even thinking, "Why not me?"


  1. Beautifully put Brandi!

    (ps I laughed so hard through the Jenny books)

  2. Thanks Samantha! I laughed too because even though What To Expect lists symptoms or possibilities during pregnancy...they definitely do not give the great commentary that Jenny does!